The Emmys: Just hand out the awards, would ya?!

As far as awards show go, the Emmys are not one of your most memorable.

That is, unless they do something ridiculous like last year’s “Emmy Idol.” In my opinion, the Emmy telecast itself has not been entertaining since the last time NBC broadcast the awards in 2002 when Conan O’Brien was the host.

So then you’ll understand when I say I’m cautiously optimistic that this year’s telecast will be a good one since it’s back on NBC with Conan as the host—albeit a little earlier than usual thanks to the NFL.

So what does Conan have planned for us? Reports are that he taped a segment with Kiefer Sutherland and Mary Lynn Rajskub on the set of “24” and a segment with an actor from one of the “snubbed” shows. I like the sound of that already; but, of course, there are some additional things planned that will no doubt mess things up. Here’s what we’ll see according to “USA Today”:

A musical tribute to Dick Clark, hosted by Simon Cowell and featuring Barry Manilow singing the “American Bandstand” theme. Clark will also appear.
A tribute to the new TV “golden age.” Candice Bergen will host the two-and-a-half minute segment spotlighting 75 current cable and broadcast shows.
An acknowledgement of technology by showing the nominees for one category on cellphones and iPods held by members of the audience.

“USA Today” did not mention the previously announced tribute to Aaron Spelling, so I don’t know if it’s still planned or if it was scrapped due to the Tori-Candy feud.

None of these things are as stupid as “Emmy Idol,” but I’m not sure they’re all that necessary either. I agree that Dick Clark deserves to be saluted, but the timing seems a little off to me and a musical tribute just sounds corny. As for the “golden age” segment, I could’ve sworn the whole three-hour telecast was meant to acknowledge what’s good about TV. I wonder if this is the producers’ way of appeasing people from the “snubbed” shows. As for the technology bit, why can’t they just hand out the awards!

One of the things I hate most about the Emmys is that they take so long with the stupid “entertaining” stuff, that by the time they get to the final categories, they stop showing clips from the nominees. Since I don’t watch all of the shows, it would be nice to see the actors’ work; but I guess it’s more important to see the cast of “Will & Grace” pretend to be singers and dancers on “Bandstand” (I don’t actually know that’s going to happen, I’m just speculating.).

The Emmys (and every other awards show, for that matter) should take their cues from the Golden Globes. No host, no comedy monologues. Just awards and genuinely heartfelt and funny acceptance speeches with real spontaneous moments.

Not that I don’t love Conan hanging out on the set of “24,” because I do. I just don’t want to have to see Donald Trump singing in overalls again.

The Emmy Awards air this Sunday at 8 p.m. on NBC.